Monday, November 5, 2012

Honor Accountability and Training - Hat Inventory


By Jeremy A. Maynard, CEO and Co-founder The Furthering Fathering Corporation

Dads are go-to guys. Much is seemingly expected. Much is unknowingly given. Much is definitely required. Fathers are looked to…even while fathers compartmentalize to focus on the task at hand like the small town mayor. It could get more confusing if we did not separate things to focus. Think of the many roles in which you are looked to. Have you counted the costs represented in each role? Every position of authority that a man holds is actually an age and environment appropriate fathering position. Including actually being a father, each position deserves honor - and is to be held honorably. How do we do this? What if there were within a dad a commitment to integrity and maturity – for his sake and the sake of his child? This commitment applies to each hat or role or fathering position a dad has. It is consistency doing the right things, the right way, for the right reasons. How each hat is worn will affect how he and his family are received.





Only a fool will try to do it all on his own.  In jail solitary confinement is punishment. Fathering without help is punishment – for our children. Wouldn’t it be powerful if there were mechanisms, principles and relationships in place so that a father could safely maintain integrity and have an outstandingly beneficial relationship with his child? Being honorable is almost never a solo act or perfectly carried out. It begins with honesty with one’s self and how we tend to be wired.  To do a job, men need to know the team, responsibilities, rules, boundaries and spirit of the rules – the realistic expectations – of the job. To wear the hats necessary to be a father, the same is required. Last lesson you were asked to list the hats you wear. What did your list look like? Here at Furthering Fathering we want to help enhance your perspective. 



The Bible says "But don't begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it? [Luke 14:28 - New living Translation]

You can do it Dad...with Honor, Accountability and Training. The cost is quality involved time. Part of counting the costs is knowing the hats you where, when to wear them and why you wear them

Here is a partial inventory of the many hats or honorable roles dads wear for their children:

Archangel – a messenger responsible for messengers to give and pass forward the BIG picture from the AUTHOR and FINISHER to his child
Prophet – the one who hears from DIVINITY and conveys what is right and wrong [the tone of faith]
Priest – the one who prays and seeks wisdom on behalf [the intercessory tone of reverence and repentance]
King – the human authority who is ultimately responsible for boundaries, rules, dignity, peace, war, blessing, justice, order, naming, expectations, honor
VisionaryEnhancer – Renovator – the one responsible for creatively creating and encouraging opportunities for a child to see and seek their potential
ServantWorker – set the tone of humility, philanthropy and work ethic
MaintenanceRepairman – displays proactive care  in maintaining resource and relationship functionality
Model of Manhoodthe child will learn what it is to be and expect from a man from their father first
Model of a Husband - the child will know the expectations and qualities of a good husband based on how dad honors his wife
Model of Courtesy, Friendship and Relationshipsfathers establish and enforce etiquette, honoring and being a true friend, networking and boundaries for relationships outside of the home
Champion – Advocate – Activist – Lobbyistdads make it clear that he will fight on behalf and for the benefit of his child

Mentor - Counselor – Advisor – Accountability Leaderit is a valuable experience for a child to know that their father is betterment oriented and consistently seeks to share wisdom  in and out their house and community
Protector – Comforter - Insurer – Policemandads manage the present and future well-being and safety of his child’s person and character
Teacher – Professor – Instructor – Trainerthe provider of high quality and applicable knowledge wisdom and understanding so that the child will love better
Leader - Initiator
Provider – Investor- Establishes Inheritancedad is fiscally responsible and ensures the means and examples for present and future living
Accountant and Advisor- displays, learns and teaches the value of money and counting the costs of saving
Scheduler – Plannerdads teach the value and benefit of time management, rest and hierarchy of event importance
Coach – Manager - fathers foster a mindset of winning, discipline, teamwork and personal improvement for the benefit of the team/family/organization
Employerdad is the first to assign and reward hard, diligent work
Transporterdad ensure the safe travel of his children to and from locales
Entertainerfathers are to maintain and encourage joy in the home. Later it is what they will measure their childhood by the amount of joy they experienced

Dad, you are a very active guy based on this inventory! Dads communicate all of these either positively or negatively – unintentionally or intentionally. You could probably think of more hats that you where, especially at work or in social settings or volunteering. The currency in each group is taking advantage of teachable moments. By being intentional and highlighting purpose consistently your child will be trained at being a parent at most and taking responsibility while using wisdom at minimum. Given these hats or roles listed how would a neutral observer grade you as a father? How would you grade yourself? Who holds you accountable in these areas? 

We will go over each on, one at a time in future lessons, on the phone conference and our break-out sessions

Fatherhood is a blessing. Be blessed and bless your child, Dad.